I want you to know that reading this newsletter will not just make your life better; it will make the world a better place because you have decided to be happy!
Congratulations on the impact the happiness Decision will make on you for the rest of your life, and those around you.

"Act the way you'd like to be and soon you'll be the way you act." - George W. Crane

SMILE, HAPPINESS BECOMES YOU!
Sending Love, and Happiness to you,
Lionel

Happ-E-Thought:) "There is more to life than increasing its speed". - Gandhi

Happ-E-Purpose:) Reminding you to make the "Happiness Decision." Letting you know about our meeting dates, giving you more happiness information, and the latest copy of the Be Happy Zone Article that's published twice a month in the Fairfield Citizen-News. Read today's article called: Get What You Want!

Happ-E-Quote:) "It is said that the quality of life is determined by what you do in the space between stimulus and response -- choose the response that will bring happiness" - Pam Golden

Book Recommendation:) "Choose the Happiness Habit," by Pam Golden. An excellent book for understanding happiness, and also making it a part of your life. Pam understands happiness and shows you how to use it. Pam says: "First, you have to recognize that your happiness is the most important thing in the world. There is no greater contribution you can make to the world than to become a person who consistently experiences joy and enthusiasm for life." She also uses wonderful quotes and Pam has excellent resources that are current and top notch. I know she understands happiness. I acknowledge her for it, and so will you. I think everyone should read her book. Click here: Choose Happiness Home Page

Happ-E-Quote:) "If you want to increase you happiness, if you want to enjoy life more you have to work at it, you need to take control of your thinking, your attention and what you do. Only you can do that. You can choose to think and act in ways that have been proven to bring happiness." - Pam Golden

www.Happinessclub.com:) Hi Lionel - Just a brief note to say well done on the happiness club website going over the 10,000 visitors mark. (I was visitor no. 10,002) By the way, I love your newsletter. I particularly like the idea of the BHD! - Michael
Nugent, Dublin, Ireland, author of the book, Happying - You Do It, Not Pursue It!

Happ-E-Quote:) "Sometimes it's more effective to act your way into a new thought pattern than to think your way into new behaviors. In fact, sometimes it's the only way." - Pam Golden

Happy Mail:) Thank you to Chris Zurcher for sending us this great mail.
SYMPTOMS OF INNER PEACE some signs to look for:

- A tendency to think and act spontaneously rather than on fears based on past experiences.
- An unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment.
- A loss of interest in judging other people.
- A loss of interest in interpreting the actions of others.
- A loss of interest in conflict.
- A loss of the ability to worry. (This is a very serious symptom.)
- Frequent, overwhelming episodes of appreciation.
- Contented feelings of connectedness with others and nature.
- Frequent attacks of smiling.
- An increasing tendency to let things happen rather than make them happen.
- An increased susceptibility to the love offered by others as well as the uncontrollable urge to extend it.

Happ-E-Mail:) Thanks to each and every one of you for sharing your caring words and thoughts. Please let us hear from you; spread your happiness, that is the surest way of Being Happy! Happinessclub.com is a site to see! Click here: www.happinessclub.com

Happ-E-Quote:) "The first step towards the solution of any problem is optimism." -John Baines

Recommended Web site:) Click here: Welcome to the American Town Network
If you live in Southern Connecticut you can go on this web site and have them send you a reminder for the upcoming Happiness Club meetings as well as other things going on in your area.

Happ-E-Quote:) "The human race has one effective weapon--and that is laughter."
- Mark Twain

Happ-E-Mail:) Dear Lionel, I enjoy your Happ-E-Newsletters -- keep up the good work. Though it's been a while since we've seen each other you are never far from mind. Keep spreading the smiles! - Rich Kuepper, President L.E.A.D.

Happ-E-Quote:) "We have enough people who tell it like it is--now we could use a few who tell it like it can be." - Robert Orben

Happ-E-Mail:) Thanks very much to Meredith Martin for sending us this great information:

Research Says, Ed Diener and Martin Seligman recently published a study comparing the upper 10% of happy people to people of average and low happiness.

They found:
- The very happy people rated highest in measures of good relationships.
- They also spent the least time alone and the most time socializing.
- No one variable was sufficient for high happiness - but all members of
very happy group reported good quality social relationships.

Try this. . .
Dedicate time this week to work on a relationship that has been challenging you.
What can you do to strengthen that relationship?
©2001 Kate Bedford, Six Seconds http://www.6seconds.org>

Happ-E-Quote:) "We shall never know all the good that a simple smile can do."
- Mother Teresa

Last Meeting:) We had a really fun meeting on April 11. James Comst gave us a wonderful presentation about using happiness daily. I spoke as well, and the great group from the Atria Assisted Living Center gave us all some really great lessons in happiness.

Happy World:) Our next meeting is about KINDNESS and I thought that these words by Lynette Turner were so appropriate. They are on our web site.

This World...It Would Be A Better Place

If we would:
Walk a little slower
Keep our voices lower
Treat everyone with kindness
Know that love is timeless
This world...it would be a better place

If we would:
Love each other madly
Toss out the word "sadly"
Appreciate each moment
Enjoy it, own it
This world...it would be a better place

If we would:
Do away with racism
Replace it with em-bracism
Listen to our heartbeat
Wave our hands and stomp our feet
This world...it would be a better place

For I believe this is possible
Achievable you see
For every man, woman and child--for you and for me
With love all is possible, for us the human race
Believe it--and this world,
Well--it WILL be...a better place

© Copyright 2001, Lynette Turner

"I expect to pass through this life but once. If, therefore there can be any kindness I can show or any good thing I can do for any fellow being let me do it now...as I
shall not pass this way again." -- William Penn

Happ-E-Meeting:) Join us for our next Happiness Club meeting Thursday, May 9, from 7:00-8:45 p.m. The topic is "KINDNESS." Lionel Ketchian will be making the presentation on the subject. Don't miss this valuable meeting, and meet some wonderful people using happiness in their lives.

"Be kind and merciful. Let no one ever come to you without coming away better and happier." - Mother Theresa

Topic:) "KINDNESS."
Date:) May 9, 2002
Time:) 7:00 - 8:45 P.M.
Place:) Fairfield Public Library
In the:) Rotary Room
Address:) 1080 Old Post Road, Fairfield, CT 06430

Open to the Public and Admission is Free
Call Lionel Ketchian (203) 258-7777 or E-mail: PrintLRK@aol.com
http://www.happinessclub.com

"Kind words and good deeds are eternal. You never know where their influence will end." - H. Jackson Browne

Directions to the Fairfield Public Library
From New York - I- 95, Exit 21, Mill Plain Road. Right at bottom of ramp. Under railroad overpass make a left at light (Post Rd.), 1/2 mile on right at the corner.
From New Haven - I- 95, Exit 22, North Benson Road. Left at bottom of ramp. Under railroad overpass make a right at light (Post Rd.), 1/2 mile on left at the corner.

BE HAPPY ZONE
Fairfield Citizen-News
April 10, 2002

Get What You Want!
By Lionel Ketchian

Many people think that if you're happy; you're a wimp. They believe that happy people don't get what they want. An important part of being happy is getting what you want. When happy people are not getting what they want, they do something about it, they don't become unhappy. Happy people are winners, and there is a skill to it.

Getting what you want involves doing the following things. Take your time; think things out before you act. Find the highest authority to begin with. Present the problem, in a quick and direct way, without telling them that it is their fault. Don't offend people because you have a problem. Once you let someone know what is expected by you, you will have more control of the situation. The moment you lose control of yourself, you start losing control of the person and the situation.

Anyone who can make you doubt yourself can control you. Do not allow your mind to dwell on losing, even if at times it may seem like you are not going to win. When you act out of fear, you choose the way that seems easier because it requires less effort from you. What results did you end up with? Not getting what you wanted, right? When people act from panic, they try to avoid appearing weak and that's when they make the mistakes that cost them what they really wanted in the first place.

Feel comfortable, speak clearly while you look at people. Listen to others but don't argue with them. It is most important to tell people what you want, and not criticize the person. State your case without putting them down. Don't be self-conscious, people think more about themselves then they do about you. Accept yourself and don't reveal your weaknesses to others. Don't encourage others to undermine you.

Remember that people do not see things the way you do, or reality the way it really is. They have their own logic and their own point of view. If you can understand the person you are dealing with you will be better able to manage him. Getting what you want means managing your own authority. Acting with authority is not illegal; it is essential in getting things done. You direct people into them giving you what you want.

If the other person gets angry, don't react. Keep your emotions to yourself. Give people the room to express themselves. Remember you are there to get what you want! Hurting the other person or getting even with them has nothing to do with what you really want. To get what you want you need to manage others by controlling yourself. When you disagree with people they will want to stop dealing with you. When you tell people they are wrong, you are lessening you own chances for getting what you want.

By being a happy person others are more receptive to you. Act as if you expect to get what you want. You are helping people, not manipulating them. Instead of saying people are wrong, discuss how to remedy the problem, so you get what you want. People do not want to lose a fight and weaken their power. If they know they are going to lose something, they will back off. Make compromises whenever you can, but know when you must have what you want and nothing less will do.

When you are given what you want, accept it warmly and show your appreciation for their assistance. If you don't get what you want don't blame others for not managing them the way you need to do. Unhappy people need to blame someone for not getting what they want. Happy people understand what situations can be changed and which ones cannot be.

Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, the author Flow, said: "Of all virtues we can learn, no trait is more useful, more essential to survival, and more likely to improve the quality of life than the ability to transform adversity into an enjoyable challenge."

Winners do not tolerate others taking advantage of them. Happy people realize that if others are encroaching on their space it is their responsibility. They know where their boundaries are and they work quickly to let others know they are not doing the right thing. Learn to direct other people in your life, rather than letting them control you. This way they expend the least amount of effort, and get the greatest results. The longer you wait, the harder it will be.

Happy people express their hurt when someone does something to annoy them. Happy people will let others know how they feel. If you don't, then your hurt will turn into anger, and make things even worse. The more you allow people to walk all over you, the more invitations you are sending out for other people to do the same thing. Prolonged anger will dissipate happiness faster than anything will.

Happy people do not allow people or events to disturb them. Happiness is important to them so they go about doing everything to preserve their peace of mind. Once you know you are right, assert you rights and authority and go at it with everything you've got. Believe in what you are doing, and fight for your rights, without making yourself unhappy. Happy people know what battles to fight and which ones are not worth fighting. Winning is not making others lose, winning is getting what you want. Act to win, act like your winning, and act like you have already won. Getting what you want is not about taking advantage of people; it is managing the world you must live in.

Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club. He can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The Web site is www.HappinessClub.com.

Share a smile and forward this Newsletter to your friends. Or, it's FREE, and easy to subscribe. Just send your e-mail to subscribe at: Happinessclub@aol.com, or subscribe online at: http://www.HappinessClub.com

Happ-E-Thought:) "If you envy successful people, you create a negative force
field of attraction that repels you from ever doing the things that you need to do to be successful. If you admire successful people, you create a positive force field of
attraction that draws you toward becoming more and more like the kinds of people that you want to be like." - Brian Tracy

Enjoy it, and send it on to the friends you care about. Please feel free to forward this or any of the Happ-E-Newsletter to anyone you so desire. Please include the copyrights and credits due the authors.

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