Happ-E-Newsletter for March 15, 2004

Welcome My Dear Friend,

I was talking with Jane, a wonderful woman who will be starting our first Happiness Club in Canada. We had a fantastic conversation and we have become friends for life. She happened to mention that she never wants to be normal, and that being herself is perfect enough. I loved the thought that being normal was not something happy people should aim at. Then I got an e-mail from Dr. Bernie Siegel who wrote, "Only those who feel inadequate seek to become normal." So don't shoot for being normal like other people. Be yourself and that will be much more than good enough. As Judy Garland once said, "Always be a first-rate version of yourself instead of a second-rate version of someone else."

Happiness Empowerment to You!
PRACTICE HAPPINESS - LIVE RICHLY

Happiness is one of the most important things in your life. Happiness does wonders for your soul. I want you to practice "Premeditated Happiness." Happiness is an issue of power. We give our happiness to others for many reasons. Then we think that they make us unhappy. The truth is that we have given others the power over ourselves. We must take our power back in order to be happy again. Now is the time for you to learn to use happiness in dealing with challenges and difficult people in your life so you can develop the strength to prevail. You should know that reading this newsletter will not just make your life better; it will make the world a better place because you have decided to be happy!

Reminding you to make the "Happiness Decision." Letting you know about our meeting dates, giving you happiness information, and your latest copy of the Be Happy Zone Articles that are published every other Wednesday in the Fairfield Citizen-News. At the end of this newsletter you can read the latest article called: Better Than Chocolate!

"An optimist is the human personification of spring." - Susan J. Bissonette

Think Smart, Look Smart, Be Smart...Be Happy! - Lionel Ketchian

Happ-E-Quote:) "Avoid the crowd. Do your own thinking independently. Be the chess player, not the chess piece." - Ralph Charell

Here is a lovely quote: "Don't ask yourself what the world needs--ask yourself what makes you come alive, and then go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive." Harold Thurman Whitman. Happily, Jane from St. Catharines, Ontario

Happ-E-Quote:) "If I had my life to live over... I'd dare to make more mistakes next time." - Nadine Stair

Happ-E-Mail:) I always enjoy your newsletter! Could you please let your readers know about some free services we offer to spread good news and encourage positive behavior?

Lionel, thank you so much for making the world better. It's great to see that it is such a popular notion! Take care, Mary Jesse, "Committed to improving the quality of life."

Happ-E-Quote:) "Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do, than by the things you did do. So, throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." - Mark Twain

Happ-E-Mail:) Thank you for your wonderful Happy Newsletters. Just finished enjoying the March 1st issue which has inspired me to at last pass along this little tidbit I'd been contemplating sending you of late. After reading your article, it seemed possibly appropriate. (Though not entirely certain, I think the tale might be attributable to author Gary Zukav.) A reporter once asked a monk from Tibet, "Why are you always so optimistic? Your country is occupied by a foreign army, and you may never be able to see you family again." "Because," said the monk, "it makes me feel good." This monk knew how to choose his thoughts deliberately. Kinda makes one contemplate what thoughts we ourselves might be thinking or choosing for ourselves, doesn't it? Ha! Don't ya just love it! I indeed seem to be getting just a little bit better at it with every opportunity. At least I THINK I am! Feels like it at least! Practice makes perfect! I can't begin to tell you the number of times I might think of happiness in a day that might give me pause to smile, and help lift me anew toward my own 'emotional competence'! Can't recall where this next 'just now stumbled upon' bit came from. Anyway, seemed also of possible interest. "Life is lived from within and one can never be hurt by what appears to be happening outside. You can change circumstances, if you so desire for your only purpose in life is to make choices. Once the choice is made, the entire universe moves to bring into fruition that which you chose." - Barry

Happ-E-Quote:) "The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work." - Richard Bach

The other day I said that you can choose to be happy, noting that on occasion it might be difficult to stick by that decision. I can already hear the chorus of objections. How can I be happy when somebody is rude to me? I don't want to be happy when I lose somebody close to me? I can't help it if I'm mad; he cut me off in line. You have the freedom to choose. Don't be mistaken. Choosing happiness does take effort, something few people seem willing to do. Like any other freedom, you must fight for the freedom to choose happiness. Isn't it funny the silly things that people will go to great efforts fighting for (or against), but we are willing to let so much happiness slip through our fingers by just saying "I can't help it." If you don't want to be happy, that is your choice and your right. There are times, like when we lose somebody dear to us, when we don't want to be happy. That is your choice to make. But most of the time there is no reason to feel anger, frustration or irritation at people or events around us. "I can't help it" really means "I choose to let the irritating person decide how I will feel." "If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice." -- Rush, in "Free Will" What choice will you make today? David Leonhardt, The Happy Guy
Happ-E-Quote:) "The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one." - Elbert Hubbard

Happ-E-Book:) Second Innocence, Rediscovering Joy and Wonder by John Izzo, Ph.D. It is published by Berrett-Koehler. Is it possible to age yet keep the sense of wonder we had as children and experience the joy of being alive every day? Can we hold on to our ideals at work and in life even after watching the evening news? Do we have the power to change the world around us? Second Innocence is about rediscovering the wonder and joys of life at any age.

Happ-E-Quote:) "I want to tell you something today, something I very much hope you will remember. John, most of life is rowing and if you don't learn to be good at -- and enjoy -- the rowing, you will grow up to be a very unhappy man." - John Izzo, Ph.D from Second Innocence.

The Happiness Show on TV:) Watch "The Happiness Show," every Wednesday night, at 8:30 - 9:00 PM. Tune in and catch some happiness. Your CO-hosts are Lionel Ketchian & George Ortega. It will be broadcast in six towns on Cablevision of Connecticut channel 77. It airs in Bridgeport, Fairfield, Milford, Orange, Stratford and Woodbridge. It can be seen on Cablevision in White Plains, New York on channel 76 every Thursday night, from 9:00 - 9:30 PM.

Happ-E-Quote:) "The most difficult thing I have ever had to do is follow the guidance I prayed for." - Albert Schweitzer

Happ-E-Quote:) "If your success is not on your own terms, if it looks good to the world but does not feel good in your heart, it is not success at all." - Anna Quindlen

HAPPINESS CLUB MEETING:) The presentation will be: MARCH WITH HAPPINESS, by Lionel Ketchian. I look forward to seeing you at our next meeting which will take place on Thursday, March 18, 2004, from 7:00 - 9:00 PM at Sullivan Independence Hall - Downstairs in the back. Just around the corner from the Library. The address is 725 Old Post Road, Fairfield, 06824. Meet some new friends and get yourself in a happy mood for the New Year. Bring a snack to share with others. Admission is free.

Happ-E-Quote:) "When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen." - Ernest Hemingway

Meet:) "MARCH WITH HAPPINESS"

Date:) Thursday, March 18, 2004

Time:) 7:00 - 9:00 P.M.

Food:) Bring a share a snack if you like

Directions to Fairfield Independence Town Hall

725 Old Post Road (corner of Beach Road)

I 95 Southbound Exit 22
Left onto North Benson Road
Cross Post Road/Route 1
Continue one block to stop sign
Right onto Old Post Road
Continue one block to stop sign
Town Hall is across the street on the left
Independence Hall is down the driveway from Town Hall

I 95 Northbound Exit 22

Right onto Round Hill Road
Cross Post Road/Route 1
Continue one block to stop sign
Town Hall is across the street on the right
Independence Hall is down the

Happ-E-Quote:) "Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." - Mahatma Gandhi

BE HAPPY ZONE

March 3, 2004

By Lionel Ketchian

A sweet non-fattening experience awaits you. Indulge yourself…you're worth it! Happiness is better than chocolate! Dip into happiness, cause it's the real thing! The Happiness Club has added something new. It is presenting a new Discussion and Empowerment group that will be meeting every other week, called: "Getting the Most Out of Life." It's better than chocolate and it is non-fattening. This past Sunday evening a group of eight people gathered together. We met to have discussions and empower one another. We have decided to hold meetings every other week on Sunday evenings from 7:40 to 9:00 PM. The meetings will be held at Yoga for Everybody, located at 27 Unquowa Road in downtown Fairfield. Yoga for Everybody is a beautiful studio located on the second floor.

Raymond Rogers is leading the participants of this new group. Ray was the teacher of the courses called, ''Life Lessons'' and ''Modern Relationship Strategies.'' He is a Fairfield resident. Every other week Ray will introduce a topic to the group and they will discuss the subject for the day in small groups followed by a general discussion of insights, progress and intentions. Some of the topics that are considered will be: Enhancing Self-Acceptance and Self-Love, Identifying and Defining Your Life Principles, A whole New Way of Listening, and Why Happiness-the Reasons to Make the Decision. Admission is free. For additional information call Ray Rogers at 256-8923.

As Henry David Thoreau said, "I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by his own conscious endeavor." A group of eight of us used the time at the meeting to discuss: Overcoming and Using Fear. It was a very interesting meeting with Ray Rogers leading us in a presentation and discussion. The following is the mission statement for our group. Our mission is to move ever closer to a feeling of happiness, inner peace, success, personal satisfaction and love. We believe it is important to take time to reflect, introspect, verbalize, share and encourage as we travel on our journey.

This is a part of Ray Rogers message for us. "Fear has served us humans well as a species over the last 300 million years or so. It triggers the "flight or flight" reaction. Unlike the saber-toothed tiger and the dinosaurs, we have not only survived but also thrived. Overpopulation is now more of a threat than survival.

There is evidence of man's dominance of the planet everywhere we look. Marvelous cities and skyscrapers, jet trails crossing the sky, flags flying in such remote places as the top of Mt. Everest, the North and South Poles and even on the moon! So times have definitely changed. Our concerns are now not so much fighting the elements as fighting each other. Pollution of the planet, war, religious intolerance and market share are the issues of the day. The main focus has shifted from survival to, how to get along with our fellow man who lives in increasing proximity to us.

We have progressed from walking on all fours to standing upright, to now traveling in 200 horsepower, four-wheel drive, automatic CD equipped vehicles. Do we still want to act like Neanderthals and blow the horn a nanosecond after the light turns green? Or heaven forbid, someone mistakenly goes out of turn at a four way stop!

Fear is worrying about what you are getting. The antidote to fear is switching your focus to what you can give. "Giving your ear" to someone is far superior and more evolved than "giving them the finger." And when it is all said and done, it is not how much you got that counts. The ad slogan for the Ford Expedition, "he who has the most toys at the end…wins." This was only cute in the fact that it alludes to big people still thinking like children. In my opinion, it is one of the most stupid life purposes imaginable! It disregards another saying that is undeniably true. "You can't take it with you!"

How much you gave, however, does go with you. It's your legacy, the memories of you are in all the people whose lives you've touched. How much, in your own way, you made the world a better place. A living tribute to the fact that you were here and you walked on this planet. And you walked not hunched over with your knuckles dragging on the ground constantly on guard. But in the upright position with your head much higher on the lookout still. But now looking for how you can make a contribution, not whether I should run of fight."

Guillaume Apollinaire said, "Come to the edge." "We can't. We're afraid." "Come to the edge." "We can't. We will fall!" "Come to the edge." And they came. And he pushed them, And they flew." Are you getting the most out of your life? Instead of reaching for the chocolate come to a Discussion and Empowerment group meeting, or a Happiness Club meeting. Happiness is better than chocolate! Dip into happiness, cause it's the real thing!

Our next Happiness Club meeting will present MARCH WITH HAPPINESS, by Lionel Ketchian. I look forward to seeing you at our next meeting, which will take place on Thursday, March 18, 2004, from 7:00 - 9:00 PM at Sullivan Independence Hall - Downstairs in the back. The address is 725 Old Post Road, Fairfield. Meet some new friends. Bring a snack to share. Admission is free, but it may cost you -- all your unhappiness.

Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club, a Happiness Coach, and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is www.HappinessClub.com.