Happ-E-Newsletter for May 1, 2004

Welcome My Dear Friend,

Our first International Happiness Club meeting was held in Canada on Thursday, April 22. Jane Bradley, a wonderful person that understands happiness, is the new president of the Canadian Chapter. Cheers to Jane! As a result of our first International Happiness Club meeting I received this e-mail letter.

Dear Lionel: Last Thursday I attended the first meeting of the Happiness Club in St. Catharines, Ontario, Canada. I can't tell you what a difference this had made in my life. Something so simple, I would not have believed it possible.

The following morning I greeted my husband with a "good morning" and a smile. It changed the whole tone of our day. Up until now we kind of just walked around one another, neither one of us could be called happy people. My husband was totally surprised by my greeting and it felt wonderful to start the day off that way. I went out that day and bought happy face stickers and put them everywhere. My car, different rooms in my home and even at the office.

I first heard about Jane Bradley and the Happiness Club of Canada on the radio on my way to work. I was so impressed by Jane's overall happy feeling and positive attitude I thought maybe this is the answer I have been looking for. I expected to go to a meeting with other people like myself who were really not happy in their lives. To my surprise the majority of people there were very happy people and wanted to associate with others who were also happy in their lives.

I know this is an ongoing process but I am more than HAPPY to keep up this feeling, I just wish the meetings were more often than once a month. HAPPINESS REALLY IS AN INSIDE JOB! Dawn Bergemann, St. Catharines, Ontario, Canada

I am very excited about Dawn's experience. Thank you Dawn for writing to me. I want to thank Jane Bradley for making a real difference in the world. While I am being grateful I would also like to thank so many of you for using happiness to change your lives and positively affect others as well. Thanks to Amyee Branch the President of our California chapter. Thanks to George Ortega, my co-host on The Happiness TV Show. Thank you to Renee Filloramo, our Happiness Web Master. Thank you Nancy Simon for your editing support and assistance. Thank you to all the people that write to me, call me and come in contact with me in so many different and wonderful ways. You each have contributed to my life in so many positive ways, I want to share with you the gratitude I feel in my heart. Thank you to ever single one of your that read this Happ-E-Newsletter.

Happ-E-Mail:) I got your newsletter and read about June 11. It's ironic--I am presently reading Bernie's "Prescriptions for Living." I'm excited about it. Just wanted to let you know that Meg Arena, Maria Bartram and I are going to Hartford on June 11th, to help out for the PBS special. We three were in your Happiness class together at Sacred Heart University. We will go with Terry Finelli and will meet you in Hartford. I'm really looking forward to the evening! Thanks for keeping me informed. :) Fran Gargano

As Lily Tomlin once said, "We are all in this together, by ourselves."

Happiness Empowerment to You! LIVE RICHLY...PRACTICE HAPPINESS!

Happiness is one of the most important things in your life. Happiness does wonders for your soul. I want you to practice "Premeditated Happiness." Happiness is an issue of power. We give our happiness to others for many reasons. Then we think that they make us unhappy. The truth is that we have given others the power over ourselves. We must take our power back in order to be happy again. Now is the time for you to learn to use happiness in dealing with challenges and difficult people in your life so you can develop the strength to prevail. You should know that reading this newsletter will not just make your life better; it will make the world a better place because you have decided to be happy!

Reminding you to make the "Happiness Decision." Letting you know about our meeting dates, giving you happiness information, and your latest copy of the Be Happy Zone Articles that are published every other Wednesday in the Fairfield Citizen-News. At the end of this newsletter you can read the latest article called: Man's Search For Meaning.

"A year from now you may wish you had started today." - Karen Lamb

Think Smart, Look Smart, Be Smart...Be Happy! - Lionel Ketchian

Happ-E-Quote:) "I wanted to change the world. But I have found that the only thing one can be sure of changing is oneself." - Aldous Huxley

Happ-E-Quote:) "Let me not pray to be sheltered from dangers, but to be fearless in facing them. Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain, but for the heart to conquer it." - Rabindranath Tagore

Happ-E-Mail:) Just came across this! "Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming....Wow what a ride!" At last my sentiments validated!! Had a fun time at the last Happiness Club meeting. Take care, Dal...

Happ-E-Quote:) "Don't believe in miracles—depend on them." - Lawrence J. Peter

Happ-E-Mail:) Lionel: Have you ever given any happiness coaching to prison inmates? I can't think of a segment of the population more in need of finding inner peace through making the happiness decision. It's common for inmates to embrace religion to help them deal with their situation; why not simple happiness? They are a group with nothing to lose and everything to gain! Not only would the convicts benefit, but the staff who have to control their rage on a daily basis would benefit too. I am a former criminal justice major and have worked in a prison. I am also a devotee of the happiness club! I would be willing to help you in such an undertaking! Just checkin'!!! L H

Dear L, What a wonderful e-mail message. I love your thoughts and wisdom. Thanks for being a Happiness Club member. Your thinking is right on the mark. You also understand the benefits that happiness training would produce for the inmates and the prison guards as well. I implemented a Happiness Program to prison inmates of maximum security Greenhaven Correctional Facility in Stormville, NY and medium security Fishfill Correctional Facility in Fishkill, NY. I have led weekly discussion groups with Fairfield Homeless Shelter residents.

I would be happy to talk further with you about it. You are so right about prison. The interesting thing about the prisoners I have taught happiness to is they understand it quicker than anyone else can. They have less to distract them. They know that reality is either acceptance of their situation or resistance. Once they understand the choice than they have a realization of happiness at the most basic level. Those that decide to be happy no matter what and choose it in every moment have more freedom than most people walking around have. Sending Love, and Happiness to you, Lionel

Happ-E-Quote:) "The happiness of a man in this life does not consist in the absence but in the mastery of his passions." - Alfred Lord Tennyson

Happ-E-Quote:) I've just found your web site/Happiness Club after searching through Google for more info on Dan Baker. I've been interested in psychology for decades and more recently in the work of Martin Seligman and Dan Baker. I live in England so think it fairly unlikely that I could get to one of your regular meetings! But then again you never know! I would just love to have some contact with people who are 'members' or 'visitors' to your club/meetings/website. I'm reading more and more and trying to implement the useful ideas in both Martin Seligman's and Dan Baker's books and would so appreciate any chance to discuss, write or email other people who are focussed on developing more happiness.

Any ideas? Would you ever consider starting a message board or chat room in your website? I've done searches for similar (happiness, positive thinking) groups in the UK but have come up empty, and, whenever I've suggested this kind of idea over here it seems a bit too alien for people - to put it mildly!! Look forward to hearing from you some time and hope you are having a great weekend - its 3:30 PM on a sunny Sunday afternoon here and I'm just off for another cup of tea - how very British!! - Paula Thomas, Sussex, England.

Dear Paula, I loved receiving your e-mail. I am going to put your e-mail letter in our newsletter, which I will send you. I am sure that people will write to you. Please write to our friend Paula and share your thoughts and ideas about happiness with her. Paula's e-mail is:

Happ-E-Quote:) "A team is a group of people who may not be equal in experience, talent, or education but in commitment." - Patricia Fripp

Happ-E-Mail:) l have been interested in happiness for 5 year my p/time job is a clown (fillipo the clown) can you tell me about teaching videos or books to get the happiness club started in the uk. l live in Gloucester UK, ok David
The Happiness Show on TV:) Watch "The Happiness Show," We have a new time which is every Monday night, at 9:30 - 10:00 PM. Tune in and catch some happiness. Your CO-hosts are Lionel Ketchian & George Ortega. It will be broadcast in six towns on Cablevision of Connecticut channel 77. It airs in Bridgeport, Fairfield, Milford, Orange, Stratford and Woodbridge. It can be seen on Cablevision in White Plains, New York on channel 76 every Thursday night, from 9:00 - 9:30 PM.

Happ-E-Quote:) "The snow goose need not bathe to make itself white. Neither need you do anything but be yourself." - Lao-Tzu

HAPPINESS CLUB MEETING:) Our next Happiness Club meeting will have a presentation called Happiness for Yourself. Come on down to the meeting. What's better than meeting some happy people? The meeting will be held on Thursday, May 20, 2004, from 7:00 - 9:00 PM at Sullivan Independence Hall - Downstairs in the rear entrance. Meet some great people. Admission is free. I look forward to seeing you at our meeting.

Meet:) Happiness for Yourself.

Date:) Thursday, May 20, 2004

Time:) 7:00 - 9:00 P.M.

Directions to Fairfield Sullivan Independence Town Hall

725 Old Post Road (corner of Beach Road)

I 95 Southbound Exit 22: Left onto North Benson Road, then cross Post Road/Route 1 and
continue one block to stop sign. Take a right onto Old Post Road and continue one block to stop sign. Town Hall is across the street on the left and Independence Hall is down the driveway from Town Hall.

I 95 Northbound Exit 22: Right onto Round Hill Road, then cross Post Road/Route 1 and
continue one block to stop sign. Town Hall is across the street on the right and Independence Hall is down the driveway from Town Hall.

I am enrolled full time as a graduate student! I am just weeks away from achieving my Master's degree! But you guessed it: two more years until I have my Ph.D. I have been studying a lot lately for my three day exam coming up in the last week in May. This exam will take me from my Master's work to my Ph.D. candidacy. I am really excited for this transition because I can start working on my dissertation topic of linking "happiness with leadership effectiveness." My goal is to prove we need happy leaders and they are effective!!!" - Aymee Branch

JANE BRADLEY pursued a degree in Psychology at Brock University in St. Catharines. She followed up with a career counseling disturbed teenagers, both in Toronto and St. Catharines, accidentally discovering her bliss. She continued to expand her front line experiences, counseling immigrants, refugees, abused women and their children, before opening her private psychotherapy practice in 1989. Her areas of expertise include relationship issues, surviving physical and sexual abuse, overcoming addictions, managing stress, depression and eating disorders.

Happ-E-Quote:) "To be able to look back upon one's past life with satisfaction is to live twice." - Marcus Valerius Martial

BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian

April 28, 2004

Dr. Viktor E. Frankl wrote Man's Search For Meaning 45 years ago. I consider it to be among some of the most profound books ever written.

Many people know Dr. Frankl's famous quote which is as follows: "Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms -- to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way." This is not only a famous quote but is also a triumph of truth. What most people do not know is the rest of the quotation that follows along right after this one. Dr. Frankl goes on to write: "And there were always choices to make. Every day, every hour, offered the opportunity to make a decision, a decision which determined whether you would or would not submit to those powers which threatened to rob you of your very self, your inner freedom."

One of the reasons I respect Dr. Frankl and his book is that he has personally experienced the very worst that mankind could bestow on their fellow man. Yet, he shows us triumph in our ability to choose the right thing to do in any time and place. He also knows the impact of the power of making a decision. I have said, "Happiness is a decision." Decisions are the most important factors in our existence. They affect our future and can even change our circumstances no matter what it is that we think we are facing.

You can see how important the decision making process is to the very survival of the individual. Dr. Frankl continues this intelligent logic by stating, "It becomes clear that the sort of person the prisoner became was the result of an inner decision, and not the result of camp influences alone. Fundamentally, therefore, any man can, even under such circumstances, decide what shall become of him -- mentally and spiritually. He may retain his human dignity even in a concentration camp."

The decision to be happy led me to the understanding that "to be happy," is needing, and wanting to be happy at some future time. That is when I figured out that it is all about 'being happy,' because being happy is something you are doing right now, not later. Being happy has made me free, because it has not only given me freedom but also has shown me what freedom looks, feels, and tastes like. Being happy is a freeing experience, like being let out of prison. Part of that experience comes from not wanting or needing everything to go my way all the time. That freedom has allowed me to experience peace. For what is peace but freedom from wanting? Don't get me wrong, I still want things, but I don't get upset because things don't go my way. Instead I have learned to prefer things rather than demand them. I have preferences instead of demands. I am much better off, because that makes me proactive in achieving what I want.

The way to empower yourself is to decide to be happy no matter what. Choose happiness over everything else. This gives you the power to deal with life and deal with yourself. Happiness is a powerful strategy for those who practice it. When you're happy it gives you the awareness to realize the choices you have and what option is right for you. What is the real power that you have in doing this? You have power over yourself, and this is very important my friend, because being happy is authentic power.

Dr. Frankel's book starts off explaining his experiences in the concentration camp. The profoundness of his book is that he is actually telling us about happiness and freedom within each of us. Even when Dr. Frankel speaks about suffering, he enlightens us to understand that when we find meaning in our suffering, we find our power again.

We give our happiness to others for many reasons. Then we think that they make us unhappy. The truth is that we have given others the power over ourselves. We must take our power back in order to be happy again. Happiness is an issue of power. Learn to use the power of happiness to deal with difficult people and circumstances in your life and you will prevail.

Our next Happiness Club meeting will have a presentation called Happiness for Yourself. Come on down to the meeting. What's better than meeting some happy people? The meeting will be held on Thursday, May 20, 2004, from 7:00 - 9:00 PM at Sullivan Independence Hall - Downstairs in the rear entrance. The address is, 725 Old Post Road, Fairfield, CT. Admission is free.

We search for happiness as a fruit to be picked. Happiness is a seed that must be planted.

Share a smile and forward this motivating Happ-E-Newsletter to your friends and family members you care about. Brighten their day by giving them a FREE Newsletter. Or, it's FREE, and easy to subscribe, just send your blank e-mail to happinessclub@aol.com, or subscribe online at: www.happinessclub.com.

Happiness is an inner state of well being. A state of well being that enables you to profit from your highest: thoughts, wisdom, intelligence, common sense, emotions, health, and spiritual values in your life. - Lionel Ketchian

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"Don't let go of the vine." - John Weissmuller, from the film, Tarzan.
Life is full of opportunities. Go For It! Carpe diem!

© Copyright 2004, Lionel R. Ketchian, all rights reserved.