Happ-E-Newsletter for November 15, 2004

Welcome My Dear Friend,

I wish you and your family a very Happy & Healthy Thanksgiving. As Charles Swindoll said, "I believe the single most significant decision I can make on a day-to-day basis is my choice of attitude. It is more important than my past, my education, my bankroll, my successes or failures, fame or pain, what other people think of me or say about me, my circumstances, or my position."

Ralph Waldo Emerson put it perfectly when he said, "Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen."

Sending Love, and Happiness to you,
Lionel

"Clear your mind of can’t." - Samuel Johnson
Happiness Empowerment to You! LIVE RICHLY...PRACTICE HAPPINESS!

Happiness is one of the most important things in your life. Happiness is an inner state of well being. A state of well being that enables you to profit from your highest: thoughts, wisdom, intelligence, common sense, emotions, health, and spiritual values in your life. Happiness does wonders for your soul. Practice "Premeditated Happiness." Happiness is an issue of power. We give our power to others for many reasons, and we think that they will make us happy. The truth is that we have given others power over ourselves. We can take our power back in order to be happy again. Now is the time to learn to use happiness in dealing with challenges and difficult people in your life so you can develop the strength to prevail. Reading this newsletter will not just make your life better; it will make the world a better place...because you have decided to be happy!

Reminding you to make the "Happiness Decision." Giving you our Happiness Club Meeting dates, brining you The Happiness Show on TV, happiness information, and your latest copy of the Be Happy Zone Article that is published every other Wednesday in the Fairfield Citizen-News. At the end of this newsletter you can read the latest article called: YOUR MOVE!

"No bird soars too high, if he soars with his own wings." - William Blake

Think Smart, Look Smart, Be Smart...Be Happy! - Lionel Ketchian

Happ-E-Quote:) "The belief that happiness has to be deserved has led to centuries of pain, guilt and deception. Happiness is free!" - Robert Holden

Happ-E-Mail:) Enjoyed the newsletter as usual. Loved Aymee's story. Mine is similar. I'm marrying this month. John is from England and we are going to divide our time between US and UK. We are different from Aymee and her fiance in that they are embarking on their careers. John is retired and I am "hanging up my nurse's cap" in a couple of weeks. The "Happiness Decision" definitely played a role in our wonderful relationship - he is a widower and I had just been through the ending of a 35 year marriage. Either or both of us could have been in the protective cave of bitterness, but, chose to go after a better, happier life. I have a lot of stuffed animals that are in A1 shape. Can you use those for your Basket Brigade? Most are Beanie Babies that my now adult daughter does not have room for in her tiny teacher's salary apartment. Thanks again for the light your contagious happiness brings into my life. Kathleen

Happ-E-Quote:) "Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent, and committed decision." - Anthony Robbins

Happ-E-Mail:) I'm writing because I was wondering if you still are involved with the annual Thanksgiving food distribution based in Milford? Last year I couldn't help because I had a scheduling conflict but would love to be of use this year if possible. Could you please let me know if this still takes place and of any details. Thanks so much!!! Rachel

Happ-E-Quote:) "Nothing is more difficult, and therefore more precious, than to be able to decide." - Napoleon Bonaparte

Happ-E-Mail:) Saturday, November 20th is our Big Basket Delivery Day. Since 1994 (yes this is our 11th year!!!) on the weekend before Thanksgiving, volunteers have been putting together and delivering baskets with all the fixins’ to those in need in the greater New Haven area. Last year we added several deliveries to Bridgeport and hope to expand even more in that area. We work with several agencies to find the families needing assistance: CCCC (Coordinating Council for Children in Crisis), Yale Child Study Center, Cornerstone, Bella Vista, and The Connecticut Department of Social Services.

A typical basket that we provide may include: turkey, stuffing, potatoes, cranberry juice, vegetables, brownie mix, pie, juice, donated personal care items, a toy, books…..and other goodies. We also include a book, "Notes From a Friend" by Anthony Robbins, with a quote inside saying, "This comes from someone who cares about you. All that we ask is that you take care of yourself well enough to be able to do this for someone else someday."

For the first 9 years we provided 100-125 families with food. Last year we reached a new plateau feeding 185 families. A donation of $300 feeds 10 families, $150 feeds 5 families, and $30 feeds 1 family. Any donation will help tremendously! One hundred percent of your donations go towards purchasing food and toys.

All donations are tax deductible and can be given to your contact, or mailed to: CCCC (the Coordinating Council for Children in Crisis), 131 Dwight Street, New Haven, CT 06511. Please indicate "Basket Brigade" in the memo section. CCCC is a non profit organization who has been providing client names and assists with our efforts every year. Upon completion of the Basket Brigade, CCCC will mail a thank you letter (an employer may want to hang this up) which with your canceled check will be your receipt.

We can use you on Saturday, November 20th, at 9:00 AM at:
Innovative Measurement Solutions (IMS) Inc.
282 Quarry Road
Milford, CT 06460-8508
(203) 874-2655

For directions and more information concerning the 2004 Basket Brigade, please contact:

Happ-E-Quote:) "How you react to situations is your personal choice. It is your decision, and yours alone, to determine the importance you give to any situation." - Catherine Pulsifer

Lionel, I often wonder how you might somehow find the time within your own life's living and obligations to correspond with the so very many of us who contact you, and that you do so with each and every one of us with such dedicated personal attention. I certainly don't know how you manage it, but am so very happy and heavenly blessed that you somehow do. The wonderful magic you work certainly know no bounds and I can only hope and assume you've a great many angels within you magically assisting your every effort on our behalf. I pray it is so. And on that note may I take the liberty here to offer forth a most sincere and loving "Thank - You - Lionel!" On behalf of each and every one of the very many of us so heavenly graced with your dedicated presence and loving attention, God Bless You as always Lionel. You certainly are indeed God's marvel. Keep Smilin'! - Barry

Happ-E-Quote:) "If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else." - Booker T. Washington

Happ-E-Mail:) Hello Mr. Ketchian, I have read, via Innerself, an article that brought me to the Happiness Club page, then to you a few weeks ago. Since then, I have been wondering about getting in touch or not with you in regard to Happiness coaching. For the past couple of years, I have started wondering and searching for a "happy me," that kind of disappeared and that I would like to find back. Many things I have tried on my own, from counseling (for the few sessions I could afford) to the many reading from the likes of Napoleon Hill, Anthony Robbins, Rev. Norman Vincent Peale, Steven Covey, Wallace Wattles, Echkart Tolle, the Bible and many others in bits and pieces, but still, elude myself it seems, and wonder how can I be happy. More so, when I look at all things around me, and feel so thankful and grateful for the Lie I have been blessed with, still "something" eludes me. I do not even know if I will be able to afford your coaching services (as so many other things I would like to have or follow to help me), but I have to start somewhere, and asking for your test is the first step <smile>. Thank you in advance for your reply and I thank you in advance. Serge Ayotte

Thanks for the newsletter content…Those multiple quotes are always good to read and reminders often of the way we should think and act to keep happiness in us. Thank you and hope to have more contact…I have not forgotten about the possibility of coaching with you! Serge Ayotte

Happ-E-Quote:) "The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of your state of mind." - Dr. Wayne Dyer

Happ-E-Mail:) From Lisa Simms...Whispers

The man whispered, "God, speak to me" and a meadowlark sang.
But, the man did not hear.
So the man yelled, "God, speak to me"
and the thunder rolled across the sky.
But, the man did not listen.
The man looked around and said,
"God let me see you."
And a star shined brightly.
But the man did not see.
And, the man shouted,
"God show me a miracle."
And, a life was born.
But, the man did not notice.
So, the man cried out in despair,
"Touch me God, and let me know you are here."
Whereupon, God reached down and touched the man.
But, the man brushed the butterfly away .............
and walked on.
I found this to be a great reminder that God is always around us in the little and simple things that we take for granted .. even in our electronic age
So I would like to add one more:
The man cried,
"God, I need your help!"
And an e-mail arrived reaching out with good news and encouragement.
But, the man deleted it and continued crying ............
Don't miss out on a blessing
because it isn't packaged the way that you expect.
My instructions were to send this to people that I wanted God to bless
and I picked you. Won't you please pass this to people you want to be blessed.
Expect the unexpected...
Have A Happy Day!

Happiness lies within. It's a gift no one can give to you but yourself!
Don't ever be too busy to enjoy your children. They grow up too fast.
Never underestimate the power of a compliment or a smile.

Happ-E-Quote:) "It doesn't matter which side of the fence you get off on sometimes. What matters most is getting off. You cannot make progress without making decisions." - Jim Rohn

Happ-E-Mail:) When one thinks about why they are unhappy, they are immersing themselves in unhappiness. The past is over, the present moment is where they will find happiness. I'm glad you emphasized that in your response. The good thing is that he sounds like he is finally ready to do something about happiness right now. Getting around to happiness "someday" or "when I have more time" is a huge block to getting it. I really hope he reads my book because he sounds ready. I'd be happy to send him a book free because he sounds so ready to actually use what's it. I couldn't have improved on your answer. Hope all is well and I know you are happy, Bob Nozik, MD.

Happ-E-Quote:) "Good friends are good for the heart." - Author unknown

Happ-E-Mail:) I would like to start a Happiness Club but have no idea how to begin. Please let me know what I might do. I come to CT on occasion and actually will be there on November 13 and 14th and again over the Thanksgiving weekend. Any chance we could meet and discuss it or can I call you somewhere and talk about it? Francesca Bastarache

Happ-E-Quote:) "Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work." - H. L. Hunt

Happ-E-Quote:) "Happy the man who has broken the chains which hurt the mind, and has given up worrying, once and for all." - Ovid

Happ-E-Mail:) I just returned from an amazing 5 mile walk. The weather is spectacular and I was smiling with my dog throughout our walk. I LOVED this newsletter. I was reading the letter from the woman who has lost both sons. Such courage and strength. When I read about other people's lives I know I am truly blessed. I have recently begun dating again. In the beginning I was guarding my heart so I would not get wounded again. I now know that if I don't open up my heart completely I might miss out on life's adventures! So I am living each day with happiness and trying to create a lifetime of meaningful memories! Thanks for the beautiful words from an amazing person. I am so grateful that you are in my life Lionel...thank you so much. Barbara Rudolph

Happ-E-Quote:) "Learn to see, and then you'll know that there is no end to the new worlds for our vision." - Carlos Castaneda (1925-1998) Writer

Happ-E-Mail:) Are there any people or groups here in South Florida involved in the Happiness Club or any other similar groups or networks or individuals I can contact or you can forward my contact information to? Please. Thank you, Davie, FL, Jody Reed

Happ-E-Quote:) "No matter what age you are, or what your circumstances might be, you are special, and you still have something unique to offer. Your life, because of who you are, has meaning." - Barbara De Angelis

From Sad to Glad: 7 Steps for Facing Change with Love and Power. Dr. John Gray called From Sad to Glad, "an incredibly fun, practical and helpful book for restoring joy when it is lost." 7 Steps to a Joy-Filled Life Chris Attwood and Janet Attwood were once married. Their marriage was excruciating for both of them. It was a relief when they agreed to get a divorce in 1996. In spite of the pain, the upset and the turbulence of that time, Chris and Janet made a mutual commitment to stay in love. Not married, not connected in a romantic way, but treating each other with love and respect. As they sought to maintain this commitment, challenges were abundant. However, they noticed that no matter how intensely upsetting any particular interaction they had might have been, they were always able to return to a place of love and respect, without sacrificing themselves. Their years of mediation, relationship seminars and self-inquiry helped them see that there was a process which they each went through, in one way or another, which always led them back to that loving, yet very powerful place of connected independence.

Life's Secrets in a Light-Hearted Package. Now they've teamed with musician/creative writer, Jimmy Moore, and master cartoonist, George Foster to present The Expansion Process® and the profound principles which have led them to living the life of their dreams. Together this team has created a book with big type and lots of cartoons which might be mistaken for a children's book if one didn't read the words. Yet reading reveals profound principles, deep insights and practical tools which readers can put to use immediately. While the 7-step Expansion Process emerged from the challenges of facing drastic change in the nature of their relationship, Janet and Chris have demonstrated that this simple process is equally effective for facing change in business, in health, in location or any other upheaval which life may throw at us. "Simply put, the knowledge in this book is groundbreaking. . . I invite you to use this knowledge to create the life you have been dreaming of living." - from the Forward by Robert G. Allen #1 NY Times Bestselling Author, Creating Wealth, Nothing Down, and The One Minute Millionaire: The Enlightened Way to Wealth

Happ-E-Quote:) "Since the perfect human being has not been discovered, we all need to live with our hang-ups and our idiosyncrasies until they can be ironed out. One of the most important qualities in successful, dynamic living is that of self-acceptance." - Denis Waitley

HAPPINESS CLUB MEETING:) Our next Happiness Club meeting will have a presentation called, "HAPPINESS HINTS!" Look forward to seeing you. Come on down, meet some great people, get connected, and be happy.

Meet:) "HAPPINESS HINTS!"

2004 UPCOMING HAPPINESS CLUB MEETINGS DATES:)
Holiday Party on Thursday, December 16, 2004

Directions to Fairfield Sullivan Independence Town Hall
725 Old Post Road (corner of Beach Road)
I 95 Southbound Exit 22: Left onto North Benson Road, then cross Post Road/Route 1 and
continue one block to stop sign. Take a right onto Old Post Road and continue one block to stop sign. Town Hall is across the street on the left and Independence Hall is down the driveway from Town Hall.
I 95 Northbound Exit 22: Right onto Round Hill Road, then cross Post Road/Route 1 and
continue one block to stop sign. Town Hall is across the street on the right and Independence Hall is down the driveway from Town Hall.

Happ-E-Quote:) "To be free is to have achieved your life." - Tennessee Williams (1911-1983) Playwright

The next meeting of the Canada Happiness Club is scheduled for November 18, 2004. The GUEST SPEAKER BARRY SHAINBAUM is an internationally renowned photographer, speaker, author and musician, BARRY SHAINBAUM has survived bipolar disorder, jail, the judicial and psychiatric boarding house system, 18 years of medication and therapy before turning his life around. He is considered cured of an illness previously considered incurable, and is a true inspiration to us all. The time if from 700 - 8:30 PM. It will be held at a new location: The Normandy Resource Centre (The Legion), 111, Church Street, St. Catharines, Ontario. This facility is fully accessible. Admission is A smile and as always is free. Cheers! Jane

Happ-E-Quote:) "Wisdom is not a product of schooling but of the life-long attempt to acquire it." - Albert Einstein

BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
November 5, 2004

YOUR MOVE!

But even during the good times I still found myself unable to be happy. Does anyone have any suggestions for me on how I should proceed with determining the roots of my unhappiness? I'm not sure why, but I feel as though I do not deserve to be happy. I have a great ability to bring out happiness in others, my family, my friends and even people I meet for the first time. However, when it comes to my own happiness, I'm unsure how to proceed. I hope this note does not cause anyone any unhappiness." Thanks, David from Melbourne, Australia

Dear David, Thank you for your letter and questions. I would like to ask you for permission to use your question in one of my articles about happiness. I would like to answer your question in that article. Your question is exactly what many other people experience in their lives.

That would be fine Lionel. Thank you for taking the time to read my letter. David

Dear David, It is extremely hard to go through life without feeling happiness within yourself. It is a wonderful thing that you have the ability and desire to bring it to so many others. This is more common than you might imagine. Since you have not experienced happiness even in the good times the answer lies within you. David, this is excellent news because you don't have to travel anywhere to get the answer you are looking for.

The key to your dilemma is contained in your statement, "I feel as though I do not deserve to be happy." You have never given yourself permission to be happy. David, as of right now I am giving you permission to be happy. If you take it…than you are accepting a gift. If you don't…than you are refusing a gift. You have been given the gift of happiness, but it is up to you to want it bad enough to use it. David you can decide right now to act like you are happy and start feeling happy. It is time…what are you waiting for? Life is short and happiness is the most important thing you can do.

You have experienced happiness in your life when you were younger, but not later in life. Do you know why that is? As we get older we think about everything much too much. It is not thinking David it is compulsive thinking. We over analyze, worry about everything and we call it thinking. Most people do not "think" they obsess over things. They allow the mind to be troubled. It is time to let your happiness lead your thinking, rather than allowing your unhappiness to lead your thinking. You made the statement, "I need to somehow discover why I'm so unhappy." David, that is not going to help you in any way whatsoever. All that will do for you is keep you thinking about your unhappiness.

It is time to go forward and to use happiness for your benefit. You know how helpless unhappiness can make you feel. It is time to know how powerful happiness can make you feel and function. My words can help, but you need to continually condition yourself to choose happiness. You must learn all you can about happiness. You can read the wonderful book, Happy 4 Life: Here's How to Do It, by Bob Nozik, M.D. Dr. Nozik is an amazing individual and he is in charge of the California Happiness Club. He has studied and learned how to personally remain happy for the last 18 years. He can show you how to do it as well. I can also recommend three books by Richard Carlson, Ph.D. Shortcut Through Therapy, You Can Be Happy No Matter What, and You Can Feel Good Again. There are many other books as well. We have a great deal of them on our web site.

Thank you for your interest in being happy because that is what will change the world. Congratulations for being brave enough to search for the happiness answer. Keep reading these articles, keep reading my newsletter and when unhappiness comes knocking, don't answer the door. Or, those unhappy thoughts will come right in and make themselves at home. You now can have a full house with happiness and there will be no more space for unhappiness. It is up to you! You asked for it and I hope you got it. What will you choose now? Let me give you a life saving hint, CHOOSE HAPPINESS!!! David, it is your time and it is your move. Remember David, IT IS ALWAYS YOUR MOVE!

Our next Happiness Club meeting will be on Thursday, November 18, from 7:00 - 9:00 P.M. There will be a presentation called, "HAPPINESS HINTS!" The meeting will be held at the Sullivan Independence Hall, Fairfield. Admission is free; everyone is welcome. Look forward to seeing you. Come on down, meet some great people, get connected, and be happy.

Do you want to see Dr. Bernie Siegel? The DVD Video: Conversations with Bernie, Health & Happiness. Dr. Bernie Siegel and Lionel Ketchian share in a delightful conversation together for over one hour. The interview took place in Dr. Siegel's home and was aired on Public TV. Three cameras were used to beautifully capture the mood and the moment professionally done by Van Gorder Studios. It will feel like you are there with us, as we journey together. Join us and share the moment now! You can order a copy by sending a check (payable in US funds) for $19.95 plus $2.00 shipping in the US, for as many DVD's as you want. Send check to LRK Communications, Inc. 63 Unquowa Road, Fairfield, CT 06824.

The DVD Video: Conversations with Bernie, Health & Happiness is available at one store: The Wisdom of the Ages, located at 1408 Hopmeadow Street, Simsbury, CT 06070. Phone #. 860-651-1172.

Please feel free to forward this to anyone you desire. Please include the copyrights and credits due the authors.

Our mailing list and your name is never sold, traded, or given to anyone outside of our organization. You can smile about that!

REMOVAL INSTRUCTIONS: To be removed from this Happ-E-Newsletter reply with "Remove" in the subject line.

"Don't let go of the vine." - John Weissmuller, from the film, Tarzan.
Life is full of opportunities. Go For It! Carpe diem!

© Copyright 2004, Lionel R. Ketchian, all rights reserved.