Happ-E-Newsletter for December 1, 2006

Welcome My Dear Friend!

Carol Pearson, a writer and educator, said: "Heroes take journeys, confront dragons, and discover the treasure of their true selves. Although they may feel very alone during the quest, at its end their reward is a sense of community: with themselves, with other people, and with the earth."

Losing A Loved One

How do we handle the heavy experience of the death of a family member, a loved one or a friend? If you ask other people they will offer you many ways to handle the death of someone close to us. But, what is best for you?

This past Thanksgiving a woman I know, suddenly and unexpectedly, lost her husband on Thanksgiving Day. It was not only sad that she lost her husband on Thanksgiving Day but also the fact that they both had just recently retired and were ready to live their life made it even more tragic. They were going to drive to Florida and spend time in the warm sunny climate till spring.

I spoke with her to explain my sorrow about hearing of her loss. What I found was a beautiful example of a person who was dealing extremely well with a situation she realized that she had no power to change. She explained to me that she knew she did everything she could for him. She said that she realized that she needed to accept what happened, even though she was shocked that it did happen. She said she had a strong faith and she was using her faith. What good are religious convictions if you don't use them when you need them? She did not just believe in her religion, she was using it for her own good. She was putting the artfulness of acceptance to work for her so she could minimize the suffering that would work against her.

She said that she felt the prayers and good wishes from friends and that it added comfort to her. She explained that she had a strong support network of friends and family which was extremely helpful to her. She even explained that if they were on the trip and her husband had the heart attack while he was driving the car, things could have been much worse and many people could have been killed or injured.

By accepting the way things are for you right now, for this moment only, you free yourself from wanting things to be different. Acceptance is the only way to change and free your state of mind. When you accept things, you don't make them into something that you start thinking about all the time. Once you start thinking about things that you don't accept, you start the down hill spiral of unhappiness, hopelessness, and helplessness and suffering. You can't change what has already happened to you, but you can choose to accept it.

I am not telling you to resist what you feel or experience. It is the resistance you experience that is causing you all the problems. Just accept that you feel bad for now. You can accept your feeling without making yourself feel worse. The reason non-acceptance is a problem is that what ever is making you unhappy has already happened and there is nothing you can do about it. By accepting it you stop fighting yourself. You eliminate feeling like you have become a victim in the situation.

Once you accept the situation, you have done more to change it than you could ever do by not accepting it. Real happiness is possible when we just observe what is happening inside us and how we are reacting. It is important not to try to change yourself, just become more aware of yourself. The more aware of yourself you become the more conscious you will be. Once you increase the awareness of how you feel right now, you can start to choose happiness. But you will only be able to choose happiness to the degree that you are aware of the existence that you actually have a choice.

Don't try to be happy, choose it and be happy. Being happy will allow you to take control of your thinking. Being unhappy allows your thinking to take control of you and creates suffering. By not having control of your thinking and happiness you create your problems. By not being accepting you allow unhappiness to step in. You cannot change this moment. Acceptance of this moment allows us to experience peace. You may not like what has happened but you can be at peace with it. This allows you the peace of mind to see what your best choices are now.

BE HAPPY ZONE by Lionel Ketchian

Published in the Fairfield Citizen-News on November 29, 2006

Life is complicated, happiness is simple! LIVE RICHLY...PRACTICE HAPPINESS!

Everything we do in life is for the purpose of obtaining happiness! Happiness Empowerment to You! Reminding you to make the "Happiness Decision." Think Smart, Look Smart, Be Smart...Be Happy! Sharing Love, Peace and Happiness with you, Lionel Ketchian

Happ-E-Quote :) "You must do the thing you think you cannot do." - Eleanor Roosevelt

Happ-E-Quote :) "The source of a true smile is an awakened mind. Smiling helps you approach the day with gentleness and understanding." - Thich Nhat Hanh, Peace Is Every Step

Happ-E-Mail :) I wrote to you a number of months ago and have since visited Rabbi Pliskin in Jerusalem, he is indeed a wonderful warm, vital and happy individual. I run training programmes for medical/therapeutic Clowning and base the courses on many dramatherapy elements. More and more people are coming to the courses in the pursuit of happiness and as a way through Clowning to heal themselves and then others in hospitals and other therapeutic settings. Once the six month courses are finished, we encourage the groups to meet on a monthly basis and support each other to maintain their high levels of positive energy and motivation to work for happiness in the society. I believe that happiness has become an essential survival strategy in times that are so destructive and where depression holds such a grip on so many people. I see the meetings as similar to the happiness clubs that are spreading where you are and have even called them in Hebrew ,"Happiness Clubs" and believe that such a national and international network of Happiness clubs will pave the way towards a healthier, saner and safer world, a happier, peaceful and well balanced world. Thank you for leading the way,for providing so much inspiration and I hope we will meet up in the not too distant future. Love, Laughter and Optimism, Jeff Gordon.

Happ-E-Quote :) "Happiness comes of the capacity to feel deeply, to enjoy simply, to think freely, to risk life, to be needed." - Storm Jameson

Happ-E-Quote :) "It is the Law that any difficulties that can come to you at any time, no matter what they are, must be exactly what you need most at the moment, to enable you to take the next step forward by overcoming them. The only real misfortune, the only real tragedy, comes when we suffer without learning the lesson." - Emmet Fox

Happy-Book :) Once something is past, it no longer exists. If you experience pain or insult, don't add to it by later repeating to yourself, "How awful that was." This way, it will only last the limited time it actually exists. This is usually very short. Realizing that suffering is temporary makes it much easier to tolerate insults and slights to your honor.

Happ-E-Quote :) "Feelings of gratitude release positive endorphins throughout the body, creating health." - Sharon Huffman

Aymee Coget made a decision that she would devote the rest of her life to helping people live happier lives. After ten years of studying, teaching, and experiencing happiness Aymee has perfected her life to be happy everyday. Aymee holds a B.A., M.A. and is working on her Ph.D. in psychology. Her areas of emphasis include authentic leadership and positive psychology. Aymee started the San Francisco, California Happiness Club.

Happ-E-Quote :) "Health and cheerfulness mutually beget each other." - Joseph Addison

Our next Happiness Club meeting will be a presentation called: "Happiness Right Now!" by Lionel Ketchian. We will show a 5-minute video of the WTNH Channel 8 TV News segment with Ann Nyberg reporting on the Happiness Club. Conversation and holiday festivities follow! We'll have coffee for you, please bring some cake or cookies to share.

Date :) Thursday, December 7

Time :) 7:00 - 10:00 P.M.
Place :) At the Fairfield Public Library, in the Memorial Room

Address :) 1080 Old Post Road, Fairfield, CT 06824

Everyone is welcome; admission is free. Meet some wonderful people using happiness in their lives. Future meetings at the Fairfield Library will be: Holiday Gathering on Thursday, Thursday, January 18th, February 15th, 2007

WESTPORT, CONNECTICUT SMILING SINGLE SENIORS HAPPINESS CLUB :)

Our next meeting will be: A joint meeting with the regular Happiness Club. See information above.

Stay happy and healthy - get well connected. Stacy Enyeart is the group facilitator. For further information, www.happinessclub.com or call Lionel Ketchian at 203 258-7777. Future meeting will be held on Thursday, December 21, 2006, 6:00 - 8:00 PM at the Westport Senior Center, 21 Imperial Ave., Westport CT 06880.

NEW! - MADISON CONNECTICUT HAPPINESS CLUB :)

Our next meeting will be a "Round table discussion on happiness."

Date :) Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Time :) 7:00 - 9:00 P.M.
Place :) At the E.C. Scranton Memorial Library

Address :) 801 Boston Post Road, Madison, Ct. 06443

Meetings are held on the last Wednesday of each month except for December 20, 2006.

Happiness is an inner state of well being. A state that enables you to profit from your highest thoughts, intelligence, wisdom, awareness, common sense, emotions, health, and spiritual values.

Happiness is one of the most important things in your life. Don't give away your power by being unhappy! Practice "Premeditated Happiness," because happiness is an issue of power. We give our power to others for many reasons. We mistakenly think that doing this will make us happy. The truth is that we have given others power over ourselves. We can now consciously reclaim our power and experience happiness. Happiness does wonders for your soul. Now is the time to learn to use happiness for dealing with challenges and difficult people so you can empower your life. Reading this newsletter will not just make your life better; it will make the world a better place...because you have decided to be happy!

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"Unhappiness is a form of suffering." Eckhart Tolle If you're not happy by now, it's time to have a talk with yourself. Make the Happiness Decision Now! THAT'S ALL FOLKS...NOW BE HAPPY!

© Copyright 2006, Lionel R. Ketchian, all rights reserved.